By Peter Murphy
Who does not want to have more friends and influence more people? This can lead to a happier life, a better job, and enriched lifestyle. Essentially, there are no minuses and only pluses to building up your network of friends and associates. So, here are ten reasons why those communication skills will yield more friends, and help you in influencing others.
1. Because They Show an Interest
Good communication is a two-way street. By using the simple traits of talking and listening to others, you can build up friendships and influence people. It is quite common for people to love to talk about themselves or a favourite subject. People with good communication skills will show an interest in that subject and ask questions.
Also, showing an interest can be conveyed by non-verbal signals and they're also part of good communication skills. You keep eye contact with the person speaking, you nod and gesture, when appropriate. Your body is turned toward the person and you're not just flopped across a chair.
All of these subtle body language signals convey meaning to the other person subconsciously. By honing all of your communication skills, you can win people over.
2. By Being Positive
People hear negative things all the time: in the news, from critics, their bosses, and so on. Good communication skills mean not merely focusing on the negative.
There is an old saying that speaks of catching more flies with honey than vinegar. A good communicator knows to not give feint praises; they need to be valid, but even praising a child for just making their bed or putting their dirty dishes in the sink can go a long way to influencing them.
This is where honesty comes into the picture. If you give false praise, invariably the truth will one day come out and then you have lost a friend or the ability to influence that person in the future. You can be positive without going overboard.
3. Because They Are Friendly
To get a friend you have to be a friend, and this is communicated in words and actions; sometimes merely a smile can convey that. Step one is getting to know people, which involves showing an interest and being a good listener. You then talk to the people about things they like, show an interest in those subjects, and project your desire to know the better.
You can find someone incredibly interesting, friendly and desirable, but if you can't communicate all of that to them, you aren't going to build friendships and influence people.
If you're able to talk to people in a friendly manner, if you can write to them on subject they like, if your body language conveys interest and curiosity in them, this will lead them to reciprocate.
4. By Remembering Details
It's said that God is in the details; so too is connecting with people to influence them and become friends.
This ties in with several points already mentioned; when you talk to someone or read about them, you invariably pick up small details about them, their lives, their likes and dislikes.
A critical aspect of good communication skills is remembering these details and then using them to advance your goals. If you write a letter to someone and remember to ask about their wife or mother, they pick up on that.
If you're trying to influence people to buy a product or support you, giving a presentation where you mention something that is important to them, that is a step toward winning them over.
5. Because They Encourage Others
There are plenty of naysayers in the world that will tell others they cannot do something. Part of good communication skills is encouraging people to achieve, to live up to their full potential.
This doesn't mean giving them false hope; that again is a sure way of losing friends and not influencing people.
By assessing the abilities of others, seeing where their strengths lie and then encouraging them toward a reasonable goal, you can make friends. In this case, the good communication skills are the ability to give the right sort of pep talk, or giving them the guidance to find where their talents can take them.
6. By Disagreeing Without Being Disagreeable
People won't agree all the time and some people are very vocal in their disagreements. Using good communication skills to get the fact that you disagree with someone across, without being argumentative will allow them to see your point of view, yet not feel that you are against them.
If you alienate people, that is a quick way of losing them friends and losing any chance of influencing them ever again. The best way to handle this is by first explaining that you understand their point of view, that you respect it but you respectfully disagree, and then state your reasons.
7. By Not Insulting
When you are trying to win someone over, as the points above have mentioned, complimenting people and encouraging them will often win them over. At the same time, not using vulgar language and insulting them will also please them.
Good communication skills means speaking and/or writing in a concise and eloquent manner, and not resorting to profanity and insults to try and make a point.
8. By Correcting In The Correct Way
In any element of life there are times when you have to correct someone, whether it is a child, a spouse, an employee or someone else. If you yell and scream at such people, humiliating them in front of others, and offer nothing constructive, you will lose them.
Part of good communication skills is correcting people in the right way. You point out their positive features, mention where they are falling short and then give them guidance as to how to correct their failing.
9. Because They Can Win People Over
When used correctly, good communication skills convince people to support you, either as a friend or in some other activity.
This is a talent once seen in door to door salesmen; they could talk anyone into buying just about anything. This is also something that politicians and religious leaders are famous for doing.
If you can use your words, whether spoken or written down, and convince people of your view, you can build friendships and influence people to do just about anything.
10. Because They Succeed
If you look at people who are influential, either locally or on the national stage, they are also very successful people: politicians, business people, performers, and so on. They use their good communication skills for a multitude of purposes.
When people see that a person has the ability to win people over, it impresses they, and they tend to want to follow that person and/or get to know them. It could be as simple as putting on a good performance in a show, telling some great stories, writing an interesting book or article or succeeding in business.
There are plenty of books on the subject of making friends and influencing people. Yet, a lot of it comes down to you: how you present yourself, and your words and ideas. By mastering a number of easy steps, you can improve your ability to communicate with people and thus build friendships and networks of people you associate with.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Peter_Murphy
Who does not want to have more friends and influence more people? This can lead to a happier life, a better job, and enriched lifestyle. Essentially, there are no minuses and only pluses to building up your network of friends and associates. So, here are ten reasons why those communication skills will yield more friends, and help you in influencing others.
1. Because They Show an Interest
Good communication is a two-way street. By using the simple traits of talking and listening to others, you can build up friendships and influence people. It is quite common for people to love to talk about themselves or a favourite subject. People with good communication skills will show an interest in that subject and ask questions.
Also, showing an interest can be conveyed by non-verbal signals and they're also part of good communication skills. You keep eye contact with the person speaking, you nod and gesture, when appropriate. Your body is turned toward the person and you're not just flopped across a chair.
All of these subtle body language signals convey meaning to the other person subconsciously. By honing all of your communication skills, you can win people over.
2. By Being Positive
People hear negative things all the time: in the news, from critics, their bosses, and so on. Good communication skills mean not merely focusing on the negative.
There is an old saying that speaks of catching more flies with honey than vinegar. A good communicator knows to not give feint praises; they need to be valid, but even praising a child for just making their bed or putting their dirty dishes in the sink can go a long way to influencing them.
This is where honesty comes into the picture. If you give false praise, invariably the truth will one day come out and then you have lost a friend or the ability to influence that person in the future. You can be positive without going overboard.
3. Because They Are Friendly
To get a friend you have to be a friend, and this is communicated in words and actions; sometimes merely a smile can convey that. Step one is getting to know people, which involves showing an interest and being a good listener. You then talk to the people about things they like, show an interest in those subjects, and project your desire to know the better.
You can find someone incredibly interesting, friendly and desirable, but if you can't communicate all of that to them, you aren't going to build friendships and influence people.
If you're able to talk to people in a friendly manner, if you can write to them on subject they like, if your body language conveys interest and curiosity in them, this will lead them to reciprocate.
4. By Remembering Details
It's said that God is in the details; so too is connecting with people to influence them and become friends.
This ties in with several points already mentioned; when you talk to someone or read about them, you invariably pick up small details about them, their lives, their likes and dislikes.
A critical aspect of good communication skills is remembering these details and then using them to advance your goals. If you write a letter to someone and remember to ask about their wife or mother, they pick up on that.
If you're trying to influence people to buy a product or support you, giving a presentation where you mention something that is important to them, that is a step toward winning them over.
5. Because They Encourage Others
There are plenty of naysayers in the world that will tell others they cannot do something. Part of good communication skills is encouraging people to achieve, to live up to their full potential.
This doesn't mean giving them false hope; that again is a sure way of losing friends and not influencing people.
By assessing the abilities of others, seeing where their strengths lie and then encouraging them toward a reasonable goal, you can make friends. In this case, the good communication skills are the ability to give the right sort of pep talk, or giving them the guidance to find where their talents can take them.
6. By Disagreeing Without Being Disagreeable
People won't agree all the time and some people are very vocal in their disagreements. Using good communication skills to get the fact that you disagree with someone across, without being argumentative will allow them to see your point of view, yet not feel that you are against them.
If you alienate people, that is a quick way of losing them friends and losing any chance of influencing them ever again. The best way to handle this is by first explaining that you understand their point of view, that you respect it but you respectfully disagree, and then state your reasons.
7. By Not Insulting
When you are trying to win someone over, as the points above have mentioned, complimenting people and encouraging them will often win them over. At the same time, not using vulgar language and insulting them will also please them.
Good communication skills means speaking and/or writing in a concise and eloquent manner, and not resorting to profanity and insults to try and make a point.
8. By Correcting In The Correct Way
In any element of life there are times when you have to correct someone, whether it is a child, a spouse, an employee or someone else. If you yell and scream at such people, humiliating them in front of others, and offer nothing constructive, you will lose them.
Part of good communication skills is correcting people in the right way. You point out their positive features, mention where they are falling short and then give them guidance as to how to correct their failing.
9. Because They Can Win People Over
When used correctly, good communication skills convince people to support you, either as a friend or in some other activity.
This is a talent once seen in door to door salesmen; they could talk anyone into buying just about anything. This is also something that politicians and religious leaders are famous for doing.
If you can use your words, whether spoken or written down, and convince people of your view, you can build friendships and influence people to do just about anything.
10. Because They Succeed
If you look at people who are influential, either locally or on the national stage, they are also very successful people: politicians, business people, performers, and so on. They use their good communication skills for a multitude of purposes.
When people see that a person has the ability to win people over, it impresses they, and they tend to want to follow that person and/or get to know them. It could be as simple as putting on a good performance in a show, telling some great stories, writing an interesting book or article or succeeding in business.
There are plenty of books on the subject of making friends and influencing people. Yet, a lot of it comes down to you: how you present yourself, and your words and ideas. By mastering a number of easy steps, you can improve your ability to communicate with people and thus build friendships and networks of people you associate with.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Peter_Murphy
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